When I saw Superman Returns, one of the previews which flickered onto the screen was for M. Night Shyamalan’s Lady in the Water. People openly mocked it. Not just a couple disaffected teen slackers sitting too close to the screen, no, all types of people all over the theater. They were laughing, making jokes about it. As expected, that didn’t bode well for the film’s popularity. Perhaps you can gauge how not well by Shyamalan’s latest film being described as “by the director of The Sixth Sense and Signs.” (Films from 1999 and 2002 respectively, which ought to tell you something right there.)

I knew then things weren’t looking good for Shyamalan’s career. His latest film The Happening also isn’t out yet, and already the mocking has begun, as evidenced by this poster, defaced by anonymous wits in NYC:

(photo by wellohorld)

Or, as this review of The Happening by Nathan Rabin of The A.V. Club states:

M. Night Shyamalan used to have a vast army of fans. Now he has a dwindling network of apologists. The former frightmaster’s descent from wunderkind to embarrassment has been unusually dramatic and public…

Why? Well, first his films are bad. The only (supposedly) good thing about The Sixth Sense is the ending — and I figured it out from the previews. (Really, have you people never read a ghost story that you couldn’t see that coming?) They all feel the same: soaked in dread, self-important, and more ponderously paced than a 36-hour child birth. It doesn’t help that like his films, the man himself is dreadfully self-important, strutting around as if he’s God’s gift to film. About the only good thing I can say about M. Night Shyamalan is he has some skill at crafting a story, but he comes up short in practically every other area I can think of.

I’ve thought for years the best thing Shyamalan could do is stop his two years between films nonsense, stop trying to be the next Alfred Hitchcock, and make several different genres of films in one year. The man needs to make a musical, a slapstick comedy, maybe a crime drama. It would go a long way to expanding his abilities and informing his other films’ outlook. As it is, he just keeps recycling the same crap over and over and audiences have been onto him for the better part of a decade. I don’t even bother watching his films anymore. I just look at spoilers to confirm I once again correctly guessed the ending.

But I’m not holding my breath for any self-discovery out of “Night,” as he likes to be called. He’d first have to acknowledge that perhaps he’s not the genius mommy always told him he was.

Yes, people are so over M. Night Shyamalan. Too bad he’ll never be over himself.

Posted: June 13th, 2008 under Movies.
Comments: none

I hate it when they do a bad job of recasting voice talent.

The current voice of Ernie the Keebler elf sets my ears on edge every time I hear him. Worse, it’s been so long since I’ve heard the original guy, I’ve forgotten what he sounded like. But I still know it’s seriously off.

Not quite so bad but still annoyingly different from the original is the current Geico gecko. (It’s very bad in how different it is from the original — perhaps more so than Ernie — but it doesn’t grate on me as much.) Note to Warren Buffett: not all English accents are the same. The latest Geico switch is like going from Alistair Cooke to Dick Van Dyke’s Mary Poppins cock-eyed “cockney.”

And the second guy to do Fred Flintstone never sounded anything like Fred Flintstone to me. I could never stand to watch the newer cartoons.

At the opposite end of the spectrum, Disney does a very good job of keeping the characters sounding the same despite many decades and many actors.

Not quite as good, but still laudable, are the casting directors of the Peanuts franchise. They’ve bungled it on the Geico gecko level a few times, but for the most part their ears have been surprisingly accurate, especially given that using real kids practically forces them to recast every time they make a new cartoon.

Posted: June 10th, 2008 under Entertainment.
Comments: 1

This today from TMZ (by way of MomLogic.com) regarding Hillary Clinton and coconuts:

Apparently Chelsea wanted to try a coconut when she was 4-years-old, and Hill tried to grant her daughter’s wish. The Senator managed to find a coconut in Arkansas, but couldn’t crack it when she finally got it home. Even hubby Bill, a Rhodes Scholar, was at a loss. With 50 years of education between her and the former prez, Hillary confessed neither one of them could figure out how to break open that nut.

Note to Hill and Bill: It’s called a hammer. *

Let’s hope that 3 A.M. call won’t be about an imminent monkey attack. Hey, I’ve seen Planet of the Apes, thank you very much!

 
*You might want to hammer a nail into the coconut first to make a couple small holes and drain the milk before going all Lizzie Borden on its fuzzy hide.

Posted: May 5th, 2008 under Celebrities, Democrats, The Funny Side of Life.
Comments: 3

I only bring up this blurb about the latest rumored stunt casting, because it’s such a great line.

In one of the silliest bits of theatre news, we’re told that some producer in the UK is interested in casting Britney Spears in a production of A Streetcar Named Desire. Now, I ask you, how silly is that? Can you even picture her in a torn T-shirt, screaming “Stella”? I don’t buy it for a second! — Billy Masters

Britney Spears and Tennessee Williams, two names that should not be brought up together. Tennessee Ernie Ford, on the other hand….

Posted: April 28th, 2008 under Celebrities, Entertainment, Theater.
Comments: 3

According to the trivia section of Robin Williams’ biography on IMDB.com:

(Robin) Studied acting briefly at Juilliard under John Houseman. Houseman told him he was wasting his talent at Juilliard and he should strike out on his own and do stand-up comedy.

This dumbfounds me. (Not that it’s difficult to “find me dumb,” but that’s another topic. :-p ) What, is Juilliard for people who don’t want to be performing artists? Is Juilliard for people who don’t have talent. (Well, we are talking Robin Williams…. ) What was Houseman saying about Juilliard and its students?

I wonder how many graduates of Juilliard have Oscars, and what the ratio is to the overall number of people who’ve attended.

Posted: March 29th, 2008 under Celebrities, Entertainment.
Comments: 1